Monday, February 28, 2005

Recuperate with me -- VII

Start of fifth day of recuperation at home

It has been suggested to me that this parading my symptoms in my journal is not wise, and merely focuses my own attention unnecessarily upon them. It is airing my dirty linen in public. Therefore, it is probably a good time to examine my motives.

We all seem to want to talk about our experiences, and illness is included. One resident of the old folks home used to come to meals and talk about the “tumor the size of a basketball that was removed from my bowels.” I think she probably meant golf ball or maybe even a baseball, but the image was gross enough to spoil the appetites of anyone who heard her. I don’t want to be like that lady.

But speaking about my symptoms, subtle and gross, is catharsis for me. The more open and stark I am about them, the better able I am to deal with them. When friends ask me how I am, I reply “fine” or “getting better” even when I am discouraged. But when I express my real feelings in my journal, and share the reasons why, I get responses of encouragement, “hang in there”, calm reason, “it is only your fourth day out of the hospital”, and camaraderie, “that happened to me, too”, “I have the same problem.”


Yesterday I called the Physician’s Assistant who works week-ends at the clinic where I go, and asked if Imodium was a proper remedy for my diarrhea considering the medications I am taking. He encouraged it, so I began using it immediately. It has helped.

I stayed in my wheel chair all day instead of going to bed. In fact I took a nap in the chair. I didn’t get into the bed because of my difficulty getting out of it. I will order a trapeze today so I can sit up in bed and then dismount.

I ate moderately small meals and requested applesauce which I have been told is good when you have diarrhea. I played cards after dinner. After cards I read journals. I particularly liked Where Life Takes You, Life without Laundry, and High Above the Courtside. My daughter IM’d me photos of two of her new paintings and they were spectacular. They were possible companion pieces to her present Waving.

I did not watch the academy awards. I took a shot of inhaler, a Tylenol PM, and went to bed at eleven. I had a delicious sleep ON MY SIDE, hallelujah, and woke at five. I had trouble sitting up but the trapeze should help. The care giver came by on his rounds to check on me, and he was able to help me into my wheel chair. He taught me to face him, put my hands on his elbows, and rise with his assistance. It is much smoother than any other way I have tried.

I went to the bathroom, and later ate a snack of peanut butter and crackers. I stayed in my chair, and here I am at six-thirty.


valphish said...

So, I want you to know that you ARE NOT "parading" symptoms, nor are you focusing too much attention unnecessarily on your symptoms.  I have been chronically ill for almost all of my life, Chuck.  If I didn't have others to talk to during the toughest of times, I would be in trouble!!  Your journal is for YOU!!  You aren't whining.  And you say that this is cathartic.  So, I would not think of it anymore.  I find my journal very cathartic, too.  I find great hints and tips from others, which I am sure you have by telling your troubles, too.  We just have to share - it is the human spirit that needs it!  You are a wonderful, caring, sharing person!!  So, keep sharing with us - the good, the bad and the ugly!!  I am sure you will share the funny as well!  That is what I like about you - your sense of humor!!!  You are in my daily prayers, Chuck!  Keep getting better slowly!! Big hugs, Val xox

debijanssen said...

Enjoy your journal, got it from Life without Laundry, I live in the mountains in CA am 52 female mother of 5 and happily married.  My father if he had lived would be just about your age.  Thanks for sharing.

plieck30 said...

As long as you keep your sense of humor I can take the other details. lol Paula

mysterynurse2 said...

I'm glad your caregiver was able to help you. I hope you are feeling lots better. I have enjoyed reading your journal.                        Linda