Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Hoist on my Own Petard

   My toolbar has been erased AGAIN.  For the umpteenth time.

   David will again tell me that other servers are available. Isn't AOL listening?  Didn't they notice when scads of bloggers left them when they started putting ads on our journals...in space they were charging us for?

   No.  They know that I am too lazy to learn a new protocol, and too fond of simply clicking this and that and having my journal appear, ready for new entries or editing. I have been hoist on my own petard.  (You can look that up.)

   I tried to email AOL about this but this is what came back

AOL - This is not a known member.

   AOL doen't know who AOL is?  Incredible.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Home Again - All in the Same Day

  Another one of the problems with being a senior citizen is that you never know where things are.  You know you have one, but now that you need it, it is nowhere to be found.

   I know I have a perfectly good camera tripod.  It stands tall and strong and has a tilt top, and I have no idea where I left it.  I am so sure that I cannot find it that I had to go and get ANOTHER. 

   The best thing about this old folks home where I live is its location.  Every thing you could need is within two blocks.  I can take my five mile per hour scooter to the Mall or Market, shop, and be back within thirty minutes.

   I scootered first to the drug store. No tripods. Then through the Mall looking for the camera store.  Gone.  Shoe stores, book stores, and camera stores are gone from the Mall.  Wal*Mart, Target, and Cost-co have forced the camera stores, shoe stores out of business, and a huge Barnes and Noble nearby brought the demise of the independent book sellers.

   Sears remains, hanging on somehow.  The huge store is still there filled with tons of merchandise of all sorts, while a few customers wander around the piles of goods, looking for the lone salesperson or two. How can they stay in business like that? Anyhow I found the camera department and s high school senior who was clerking found me.

  I had my choice of two tripods, either one costing $19.  One was a light weight fold up pod in a plastic bubble package, and the other was a huge, boxed, mammoth sturdy camera platform capable of holding one of Ansel Adams enormous glass plate view cameras...on sale.  The big one was a tremendous bargain. CBS could have used it to hold a studio Iconoscope. Since I had no need for the great one, I bought the lesser, passing on the bargain of the day.

   I scooted home and got back, as I say, within half an hour.  Incredible.

   Now, if you will excuse me, I know I am going to have to do battle with getting the tripod out of the miserable bubble plastic packaging.

Partners - A Quiz

Can you remember the other half of these familiar partnerships? Left click your mouse and run the icon over the answer to reveal it.

Laurel and Hardy

Abbott and Costello

Chip and Dale

Tweety and Sylvester

Clark Gable and Carole Lombard

Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn

Harpo, Chico, and Groucho

Hart, Shaffner, and Marx

Manny, Moe, and Jack

Larry, Moe, and Curly Joe

Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis

Lockheed and Martin

Bill and Hillary

Bill and Coo

Amos and Andy

Lum and Abner

George Burns and Gracie Allen

Jack Benny and Mary Livingston

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers

Veloz and Yolanda

Sonny and Cher

Howard Hughes and (well nobody..he was a loner)

Damon and Pythias

Jack and Jill

Tinker, Evers, and Chance

McDonnell and Douglas

Fibber McGee and Molly

Simon and Garfunkel

Simon and Schuster (from  mseca)

From Helen

Goodnight Chet amd goodnight ?? Helen forgot to give me the answer... I think it was David.

Hansel and Gretel

Snow White and the seven dwarfs

Roy Rogers and Dale Evans

The Lone Ranger and Tonto

From Kate

REN & ??..Come on folks, send the answers tooStimpy

From Karen
John Lennon and...Yoko Ono
John Lennon and The Beatles
(two good answers there)
Rowan and...Martin
Benson and Hedges (cigarettes)
Lewis and...Clark (not Sacajawea)
Lois and Clark (Superman)
Please add partners you remember to the comments. I’ll add them to the quiz. Then come back and play again as the quiz will grow.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Apologies to Grant Wood

   Friend Dave Burke took a couple of my silly cartoons and applied them to American Gothic.  Sorry, Grant Wood.


Your Morning Astronomy and Geology Lesson

   At 5:30 AM I went outside in my wheel chair to check on the moon.  Yes, I keep tabs on the moon, just to see if it is still there.  It usually is.

   I searched the sky to the east where I expected to see it  My view was blocked by big trees so I wheeled eastward,  I had to  travel half way around the old folks home to get a clear look east.  No moon. Curious.

   Then I looked due south. There, of course, was the last-quarter moon in clear view. i am glad to report it was in its correct position and shining brightly.

   But here is more to contemplate.  Take a student sized world map on a globe, about the size of a soccer ball, and measure twenty miles.  Twenty miles on that scale is little more than a wide pencil mark;  Now tip that narrow strip up from the surface of the globe.  That is the depth of the Earth's atmosphere.  That thin layer around the globe is all the air we have.  

   Now what do you think of global warming? Our big Earth is covered by a thin layer of air. Yes, we can change the world temperature. I used to view the world's air supply from down here where I live, beneath it. It seemed endless and far too big to be affected by anything we do. But considered from space, it is just a very thin layer around the globe. 

   And that's not all.  Take a two ounce jigger shot glass and place it on top of the globe,. If our Earth were the size of that common student's globe, all the water in all the lakes, rivers, and oceans would not fill that glass.  Makes you realize why we no longer dump our waste into rivers or the ocean. Wouldn't take much waste to pollute that jigger glass of water. 

   Mother Earth feeds and shelters us, but she is not indestructible

(End of today's sermon.)                    

Friday, April 25, 2008

Food Review - McDonald's Third Pounder

   A new hamburger advertised?  Well you know I will try it.  So I did.

   Scooted to local McDonalds and ordered their new advertised Third Pounder which, so far, is available in Californa only.   And...

   ...not bad.  In fact, the best McDonald's burger I have eaten.  I got the mushroom version,  not the bacon type.  I had planned to share it, but it was tasty, and I ate it all myself.  Meat patty was plump and larger than the quarter pounder. I could actually taste the mushrooms and the pickle.

   How did it compare with the Carl's Jr chili cheeseburger I tasted last week?  It was as good or better, and far less messy.  Both cost between four and five dollars and both give "fast food" a better reputation than their lowest cost cousins. 

   As a food critic I haven't decided to give my selections stars or bells or Oscars.  I will give the Third Pounder four out of five possible golden pickles.

Nothing New

There is nothing new in Photostream, but I don't mind touting it again.  Love to have you visit it again.

Pardon Me While I Get Organizxed

    New sign on my apartment door:  PARDON ME WHILE i GET ORGANIZED.\\

   Casino night at the old folks home was fun... HOWEVER

    The Craps dealer did NOT know the rules, and picked up my money after I made a perfectly safe throw.  It was PLAY money, so I did not object.  I just moved on to a different game.

   The blackjack dealer scooped up my winnings with my used cards.  I think he did it by accident...because it was, after all, PL:AY money.

   After a few hands of poker, someone noticed that there were two ace of hearts in the deck... and no ace of spades.  We counted the cards.and found there were 59 cards in the deck with lots of duplicates and lots of missing cards.  We had played the whole evening with a defective deck. But no one seemed to mind... we were only spending PLAY money.

   When the PLAY money was counted I found I had won two State Lottery tickets.  When they were "scratched off" I found I had won a REAL lottery ticket.  Isn't that weird?  The prize for some sate lottery tickets, is, ..a free ticket.  Does that make sense?

  Gambling at the old folks home casino is like no other.   But the object was to have fun.... and we did.


Thursday, April 24, 2008


   If you don't mind, I'll just sit here and type in my birthday suit.  It doesn't matter' there's no web cam on this computer. Why am I as bare as David carved in stone?  Because I am superannuated.  At least that is what my old tablemate, Dr. Mickle, used to call our advanced age.

   I shouldn't complain.  Most of the people who were born the same day that I was, are already dead. I am one of the survivors, glad to say But my age was showing this morning.

   When I got dressed this morning, because I am going to see the doctor this afternoon, I  put on a nice new shirt and pants.  Then I went to breakfast.  At breakfast I spilled a blob of oatmeal on my clean shirt.  I tried to wipe if off, and smeared it more, and then in cleaning the smear, I slathered oatmeal all over my front.

   Back in my room I was fuming because I had to find another fresh shirt.  In fact, I was so agitated that I wet my pants. Yikes.  Now I have to change everything. 

   So I will stay bare as long as I can. Less chance of having to change clothes again.

   On a positive note.  Tonight we have "casino night".  I have been appointed to find out how to conduct the craps and roulette tables.  Roulette I understand.  The bettor places his bet on the table on the number or color he chooses, the dealer spins the wheel and the ball falls into a numbered slot.  The dealer pays off according to the odds that are printed on the table.

   Craps, on the other hand, I do not know, so I have to look it up online.  The ctaps table is marked with the odds also.  A bet is placed on every roll of the dice, I am sure but whether the pay-off comes after each roll, or after the shooter rolls seven I am not sure.  I have no doubt that I can find the rules before tonight.  I make a very poor pit boss. 

   Casino night at the old folks' home.  Can't you just feel the excitement?

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

American Idol

   I make it a point NOT to watch American Idol, I have two reasons. (1) I don't like the melody-less tunes they choose to sing, and (2) they are trying to create an idol.  Idols earn their idol-ness by years of entertaining, like, say, Bob Hope or Bing Crosby, not six weeks on one network show.

   But Idol was on while I was doing something else and it caught my attention, AND they were good.  I just thought I ought to give credit to the young artists since I didn't give them their due before.


   BINGO is a national pastime for old folks.  For some dumb reason, this silly game is played in old folks' homes everywhere.  Old folks who do not live in institutions gather in lodge halls, carnival tents, high school auditoriums to play Bingo.

   Some play to pass the time, some play for money, some play for bits of candy, stuffed animals, potted plants, but all play for the chance to shout "Bingo".  There is something thrilling about being the first to shout that magical term.

   Now Bingo is a pure mathematical game.  The balls are chosen at random, so there is no way to gain an edge.  There are no such things as "lucky cards", "lucky chairs", or "lucky days-of-the-week".  Wearing a certain color, facing in a certain direction, or chewing a certain flavor of gum will not influence which balls will fall, or what numbers will be called. 

   The only thing that will influence your chance of winning is the number of cards being played.  If everyone plays the same number of cards, everyone has an equal chance.



   With old folks, there is no end to the squabbling over who sits where, who plays which cards, I don't doubt but that in this wide world there have been murders committed over some Bingo game.  And I further believe that the game may have been being played for dimes or pennies or Hershey kisses.  It is not the prize that is important.  It is the chance to be the first to yell....


Doodling in the Paint Bucket

   I doodle in the Paint program a lot.  I thought I might share three random samples from the files.

1.  We were asked to create screen names for fictional characters. After I made up some silly names, I doodled some silly faces to go with them.


2.  I like experimenting with colors.  This was one color pallet I made. It is bright and cheerful.


3. After  doodled a cartoon of myself on my scooter, I decided to make a whole parade of me. 


Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Toolbar Erased AGAIN

AOL knows about it  Why can't they fix it?  My toolbar has been erased...AGAIN.

It's All in the Mind

   AOL tricked me. The said they were showing "Racy" pcitures of Stephanie Rice, Olympic swimmer.

   The were pictures of Stephanie racing...not racy pictures.  It is my own fault I got fooled.  It was all in my mind.  LINK

Monday, April 21, 2008

A Note Lifted from my Sidebar

In the time it takes to read this, the Universe will grow even larger and thousands of stars will have been created. What is important to us on this tiny speck we call Earth is still a mystery.

Mid-morning Quizzle

   I awoke a while ago thinking it was five am, but it was only two-thirty. I had slept a mere three hours.  There is a full moon tonight, and I really want to go out into the south courtyard and bask briefly in the moonlight, but the powers-that-be would think I am nuts  So I refrain.

   Besides, it is cold. 

   Friend Wilma has suggested I "Go for it", but she doesn't care if I get into trouble. "What can they do to you", she asks, but her empahsis is on the you. That you, to her, is me, to me. I don't care to find out.

  So I drink some weak capuchino and ponder.  It is weak because I do want to get back to sleep and finish the night with some rest.

   Also I ponder my sentence in the entry below. Placing these anagrams took marvelous logo. Is it really a sentence? The verb is took, but what is the subject?  The noun phrase placing these anagrams is propertly a subject, but the whole thing sounds awkward and stilted.  I really need an extra word or two so I could say Placing these anagrams won me this marvelous logo, but that is outside the parameters of the rules: use only the six letters given.

   That's enough pondering It s time for some pillow pounding. I'll look for your comments in the morning.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

This Week's Entry - The Sentence Game

   Here is my response to winning last week's sentence game, AND my entry for this week...all rolled into one. Sentence Game Link.

Is it really a sentence? The verb is took, but what is the subject?  The noun phrase placing these anagrams is properly a subject, but the whole thing sounds awkward and stilted.  I really need an extra word or two so I could say Placing these anagrams won me this marvelous logo, but that is outside the parameters of the rules: use only the six letters given.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Don't Believe Everything You Hear on TV

   I am guessing you already knew that.  Don't believe everything you hear on TV.  But here are three more examples anyway.

  1.  Carls" Jr. commercial shows a young fellow eating a huge hamburger that is so enormous and sloppy that the chili is dribbling out the back.  A commentator says, "And even if you don't want the fries...you get 'em anyway."

   I scootered to Carls" Jr and asked for that "Hamburger that you get fries with whether you want them or not.... ah, to go."  I got the chili cheese burger and paid $3.45 and scooted home.  I scooted on out to the courtyard, I didn't want chili on my carpet.  I opened the bag.

   There were NO fries. 

   It was my own fault.  I didn't look in the bag when it was handed to me.  In fact, I should have known.  Patron in front of me was complaining that there were no fries in his bag.  You'd think that would have warned me.  The clerks were high school age kids, and they were very off handed and indifferent to the patrons.

   There were six paper napkins in the bag though, and that was lucky, because the chili did actually leak out the back of the burger as in the advertisement. The burger was not bad, but it was nothing like the commercial. Don't believe everything you see on television.

   2.  Staples stationary store advertises "one dollar off for each empty printer ink cartridge you bring in."  I gathered my ten or so empty cartridges and went to Staples.  I bought four more cartridges of ink for my insatiable printer. 

   "Sorry," said the clerk, "we can only take three empties a day per customer."

   I stammered and tried to think of an argument and wondered if calling the manager would have helped.  I was buying four, but could only return three empties.  If this policy is firm and my printer consumes ink at the rate it has been, I will soon be up to my butt in empties.

   Nothing was said in the advertising on television about a limit per day.  Don't believe everything you see on television.

   3. Don't believe everything you see on television. Anybody can make a commercial and say anything they want.  For example, there is an experimental promo for Dribble on television.  My friend David Burke made a promo for Dribble, using only our basic stuff, keyboard, laptop, and handheld camera. Frankly, it is only a trial run, but you may be amused to see our first run. It is on YouTube.  A click on the following link ought to get it for you. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjgIcFPsiq8

Big, Little, Good, Bad Day

   Saturday has been interesting.  It was a Big, Little, Good, Bad Day

   I like to show cars in our parking lot from time to time.  This one was a shocker.  It was parked in our lot with a sign saying For Sale, $20,000. So here is a big bargain for you...if you need a limo.  I wonder if they have put it on Ebay?



   While I was rummaging through the pockets of my power chair, I found a harmonica that I had thought I had lost.  It is the smallest one in my collection.  It is a fraction of an inch long, but I can actually play tunes on the little four-hole mini.  It is called an Oskamonica.  Lee Oskar is a well known harmonica maker.  This must be his smallest.  I put a full sized harmonica in the picture too, as well as a police whistle, a dime and quarter, for size comparison



   Valerie Fisher wrote to tell me that I had been co-winner of this week's sentence writing contest. (<-link) My sentence, made up of words starting with the letters D C N S T R is below.

   Deftly create new sentences to read


   Alas, my power chair stranded me in hall the other day.  I had to get a push home from a care giver.  It was a bitr humiliating.  I had to sit in the hall until help happened along. Then I had to phone SCOOTERMAN to come all the way from Fresno, CA, to restore it.  Diagnosis: new batteries needed.  Here s the chair, in disassembled state awaiting batteries.  What's so bad about that?  The cost... yikes.,  with the service call...nearly three hundred dollars.



Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Down the Drain, Out the Window

   Ninety-nine cents.  Down the drain or out the window, whatever you call wasted money. Now, I can afford to waste 99 cents, but to throw out a whole can of sardines...that hurts.

   How does merchandise come to be sold in the 99 Cent Store, anyway.  Because they buy odd lots, and non-standard stuff that the chain stores will not handle. They get a discount and can sell goods such as $2.25 sardines for less than a dollar.  And we can buy and enjoy them,.

   HOWEVER, I wanted a snack last night, and I took one of my bargain cans of sardines and found it was a non-standard can with NO opener attached.  Nor would the can fit a standard can opener.  I punctured the can, but could not remove the top.  I pried with a knife, a dangerous practice, and I even got a screwdriver to wedge under the lid. The olive oil leaked out, bringing the scent of sardines, but no fish.  Ah, the essence of fish...not everyone loves it as I do. If I could have snacked on aroma I would have been satisfied, but I wanted to taste the little sprats on my crackers.  No luck.

   I put the leaking can in a Zip-lock bag and put it in the trash.  I ate my crackers bare.

   Today I will buy a universal can opener that will open non-standard cans.  It may cost me $15.00 or more, but that's the price you have to pay to enjoy 99 cent sardines.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Beautiful Exception

   Although something MAY be amiss in the rest of our rose garden, there is certainly nothing wrong with Jude, the yellow rose that stands just outside my patio door.  I counted fourteen large, beautiful blooms on the one bush.



   I am still not certain of the variety rose that Jude is.  I will be searching the Internet to see if I can find out.

P/S.  Jude looks like THIS. (<=LINK)

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Less Lush

     Something seems amiss in the rose garden this season.  The blossoms seem less lush than last year.  They begin to wither as soon as they bloom.  Even our friend, Twiggy, who has the most blossoms of the red roses, and who has the earliest and most blooms, lacks the color and splendor of last year.




  Maybe the gardeners did not "feed" the roses over the winter.  Maybe there are fewer bees to pollinate them. I should have kept my promise to sprinkle plant food on Twiggy over the winter.

   The yellow roses came out early this year.  This is the most lush of all the roses, and it, too, lacks the wonder of last year.  Our friend, Jude, is the same variety as this yellow bush.  I am told that this variety is "Kennedy", but I don't know enough about roses to confirm it.                                               

                   Kennedy (?)

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Crashing Bores

Movie/Book Review:  Crashing bores.

Lord of the Rings  Any edition, any sequel.

Harry Potter  Any edition, any sequel

Watership Down.  Rabbits can't talk.

The Clan of the Cave Bear or any Jane Auel prehistoric novel.  One Neanderthal says to another, "Pardon me, I haven't been introduced to your wife." No kidding, it's in one of the books.

The Sound of Music.  The real escape of the Trapp family must have been thrilling, but the musical version...they escape by singing their way out?  Come on.

One Hundred Years of Solitude.  An Oprah Book Club selection which features one character who can rise up and float in the air...but the book is NOT a fantasy. 


   J was tagged by Special Lady Fink and asked to tell several things about myself.  It is a game whose serious purpose to promote blogging and get more people to read more blogs.  Okay, so, even though I do not know Special Lady, I will play along...sort of.  I answer the questions...but I tag no other person.  I am a sem-good-sport.

What were you doing ten years ago?  About the same as  am, except I drove my van and went exploring the back roads of Missouri.  It is a historical area, and I enjoyed finding historic sites and studying the situations of past years...especially Civil War years.

Jobs you have held. School teacher, speech therapist, hardware store salesperson, public housing placement interviewer, zoo gatekeeper, bakery warehouseman, snack bar operator, auto parts store salesman, bookeeper for chemical fertilizer plant, encyclopaedia salesman, telegraph boy, phonebook distributer.

Snack you like.  Sardines, and canned sea food in general.  General foods capuchino, crackers, both graham and soda, artichoke hearts, and AVOCADOS.  Especially Avocados.

Places you've lived. By the Pacific Ocean in a Marina with a deck and dock and three boata...sailboat, power cruiser, rowboat with motor. Also in Missouri with historic sites to explore, Los Angeles suburb, Central Valley of California with all its fruits,nuts, vegetables.  Also on the UCLA campus, and in Beverly Hillis (Before it was 91240), Fort Knox Kentucy, near the national gold depository.

What would you do if you were a Billionaire.  About what I do now except I 'd hire a jillion people to help me do it...drive, fly, tour the 99 cent store.  Imagine what you could do with a billion dollars in the 99 cent store...(buy ten billion cans of sardines, perhaps.)

I forget the other things I was supposed to tag about, except I was supposed to tell some of my bad habits.  Yeah, sure, I am gonna talk about those?  Silly.

That's all.  Not tagging anyone else though.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Films I Never Finished

MOVIE REVIEW' Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium 

   I am not a critical movie viewer.  In my long life of watching movies I remember walking out of only one because I was bored to the point where I no longer cared what happens to the protagonist.

   I have quit many books for that reason  One being One Hundred Years of Solitude. I just didn't give a tinker what happened to the main character, so I quit. But I didn't quit the movie for that reason.

   I am as inept with the TV remote as I am with the computer mouse or the cell phone or the digital camera.  I was watching the pay movie Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium.  About half way into the movie I put it on PAUSE to answer a call of nature.  But I must have pushed the wrong button. When I tried to restart...I could not access the movie again. 

   I used the on screen menu and restarted the movie, thus incurring another $5.00 fee.  But I couldn't fast forward to the spot where I left off..remember I am inept with the controls.  So I abandoned the movie and watched Law and Order or some such TV offering.

   I thought about calling the Comcast company and getting the extra five dollars removed from my bill, and having them re-start Mr. Megorium for me, but then I considered the story.

   First" It is a story within a story within a story.  A commentator is telling about Eric, a character, who is telling a story about Mr. Megorium.  That is a bit much to follow.

   Then the story about Mr. Megorium takes a weird turn.  He goes to the hospital and we get a glimpse of Megorium as a "real" person who merely has delusions about the magic of his store, and his miraculous age, 243. So, if the magic store is a delusion, that makes it a delusion within a story within a story within a story.  Follow that? Nor I.

   So if the store is not "real", then the "magic" is not magic, and there is no point to the fantasy at all.  Do I make myself clear? Not to myself either.

   I would be better off watching a Law and Order rerun.  They, at least, admit that their stories are "not based on any real cases, past or present".

   I guess I will abandon Mr. Megorium and deal with the $5.00 over-charge when the bill comes.  I think I should only owe $2.50 anyway, for half a movie.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

More Printer Woes

   Are you tired of hearing about my troubles with my printer yet?  If not, why not?

   I fixed one problem by accident, and created another by accident.  Result...it is NOT WORKING....again.

   I printed one copy of a document...largely pictures.  It quit in the middle of the second copy... for no reason that I could see.  I tried again and again, only to have it quit in the same place.  I spent hours on the problem with the trouble shooter program.  I gave up.

   I took another photo, added it to the document and tried again.  Once again it printed one copy and stopped in the middle of copy number two.  I was giving up again and unplugged the camera from the computer, and BEHOLD ... the printer started and printed a whole second copy.

   I opened the document again and set the printer to print five copies.  No dice.  It would only print one.  One at a time, that is.  Print one whole copy, and then reset the counter to ONE.  I fiddled around until I had UNINSTALLED the printer, by accident.  Since I didn't install it in the first place and I have no idea where the original disk is, I was stymied.

   I went to HP (Hewlett-Packard) online and downloaded a new driver for the printer.  Then I tried to follow the directions.  Did it work then?

   Well, no.

   So now I have an inoperative printer, with no driver, no start up disk, and no way to make it work.

   Stay tuned.



I got an email that looked like it was from AOL...with the logo and everything, asking for a credit card update.

It asked for credit card number, mothers maiden name, and full social security number.  It also asked for PIN number and my password.

I tried to send without PIN and SSN and mothers maiden name, but it wouldn't take it with blanks.  I ALMOST filled it out.  Then decided to call phone number instead. I got somebody who said she was aol... and I think it was.  She updated my credit card info WITHOUT PIN and SSN.

I think she was legitimate, but the email must have been "phishing", looking for data to steal my identity. 

Anyway, I hope I have escaped the "phishers".  I sent their email to REPORT SPAM. 

Keep an eye out for these guys.  They almost GOT ME. I think I escaped this time.


Tuesday, April 8, 2008

World's Oldest Newspaper Columnist

   Just had a visit from Frank Pelatowski who is called "The World's Oldest Newspaper Columnist". Frank is one hundred years old. His column is in the Mariposa Gazette a Mariposa, CA, weekly paper.

  His first column is about his days in the navy, which he joined in 1923. That is eighty-five, count 'em, eighty-five years ago.  He learned to sleep in a hammock.

   He has a web site, www.pelatowski.com, and you can get a link to hear an interview with Frank on radio.

   On his visit here, he was accompanied by David Burke, a senior activist, who resides in the same old folks' home as Frank. The conversation was delightful, and the coffee and cookie were free.

Nine POINT One

   AOL introduced their newest system, AOL 9.1, not long ago.  What a pain..

   Nine point One lets you see the welcome screen, with news items, weather, and whether you have mail or not, without signing on.  Fine. But you cannot read your mail, nor seek weather in other places, nor search for news items without being signed on. So what is the big deal?

   Furthermore, under 9.1 my tool bar vanishes from time to time and I must spend time and effort to rebuild it.  Under 9.1 I very frequently get a "NOT RESPONDING" icon, and the controls go dead.  I have to quit the program and reopen it to finish what I was doing.  Under 9.1 I sometimes get locked out of my journal, unable to make entries, nor even make comments in the journals of others.

   Save me from "improvements" like these.


Latest Slogans from my Apartment Door

Isn't there anything on television except LAW AND ORDER?

There's something about a soldier

Put the blame on Mame

Fifteen minute intermission

Shirts and Shoes are required

Low on Ink .. As usual

Don't spit on the floor

Please Constrain Yourself

Limited Edition Available upon Request

Ladies and Gentlemen, Please remove your hats

My Pa can beat your Pa

If you curse the light, you will live in darkness

When shall we three meet again?

With all its faults, this is still the best country to live in

You forgot our date

Democracy may not be the best possible form of government. It is just the best one we know.

Before you sing a song on American Idol, be sure you know the lyrics --Simon

How come so many popular songs are written in the key of F?

So I forgot my pants.  Stop staring at me



Saturday, April 5, 2008

In Old Folks' Home Parking Lot

   Unusual in the old folks' parking lot. Just because it is super modern and we residents are antique, this Honda Goldwing motorcycle and its Motogold trailer look out of place.

  I wonder which resident hopes to ride this.  More likely is was a grandson or daughter. Nice trailer... I wonder if it is a camper.

I saw some animal crossing the parking lot in the dusk.  I chased it.  It did not run away from me, but kept on its way.  When I caught up with it, I saw it was a wind-blown McDonalds bag, dumped by a careless passer by. Well, It looked like a puppy or rabbit at first... in he dark.

Not in the parking lot, but nearby in the rose garden.  Remember Twiggy, the rosebush we tracked all last year.  Here she is in 2008, already bushed out and bearing the first two roses I have seen this year.  Trust Twiggy, to be the first to bloom this year.

Friday, April 4, 2008

Senior Moments

   I am sure the credit card company didn't plan it this way... but it took this senior FOURTEEN telephone calls to activate his new credit card.

   Well, I blame it on my recent surgery, but I have wet every pair of pants I have put on this week, except the ones I am wearing now... so far.  Fortunately I have plenty more hanging in the closet, dry and ready to wear.

   I thought I was having a heart attack last night, but I took Tylenol and went back to bed.  I woke up this morning, so everything turned out all right. 

   I can no longer get into my van without assistance.  The Physical Therapist is looking into a "motorcycle jack" which would lift me enough so my behind can reach the car seat.  Isn't that a remarkable thought...being jacked up so I can get into my own car.

   These senior moments come more often now... and it takes fourteen times as many phone calls to get anything done. 

   Pardon these complaints... I swore I would not complain about getting old... it is so much better than the alternative.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

The Old Folks go to Lunch

   Today thirteen of us old folks went to lunch on the old folks' bus.  Thirteen at lunch was not bad luck, it was good luck.

   Lunch was at a nice courtyard restaurant, al fresco. We sat at two tables and enjoyed chatting while we waited.  Of course, being seniors, we had trouble deciding what we wanted to eat.  And we changed our minds often as we heard our tablemate's choice and it sounded better than ours. 

   Then we forgot what we ordered, and when the waitress came with the plates and asked, "Who gets the warm Tuna Melt with potato salad," no one claimed it. 

   "What did I order," asked Sheila.

   "Chef's salad," I told her.  But the waitress brought no Chef Salad.  Actually she had ordered Turkey, Avocado, and something sandwich.  But it got straightened out.

   After lunch we discovered a large soft drink on the table that no one had drunk.  "Not mine." everybody claimed.

   Then the activity director who had taken us had the impossible job of finding out who owed what...for which.  Lou forgot to bring any money at all. Sheila and Rose were, jointly, five dollars short, Alberta had to write a check...and to whom should it be made out?  Chuck had a twenty dollar bill and needed change.  Jeannie counted out the bill to the penny, and paid in quarters. Doris had to talk Alberta into including her in the check she was writing and Doris would give Alberta the money...more or less. But it all got done.

   Almost everyone had a plastic container to take home, with left overs. We don't eat a lot at a time, and restaurants serve more than seniors eat. Of course, no one would consider not taking their left overs home.

   It was a wonderful outing, with good food and great ambiance. We are making plans for next month.


Wednesday, April 2, 2008

jLand Photoshoot - Pretty Little Things

 Krissy (in Photoshoot <-Link) asks us to post the photo of some "pretty little things".  I think there is a natural beauty in fruit, particularlly lemons and limes.  So here they are


                               Pretty Little Things

   I could have included oranges, avocados, and pumpkins.  They are all natural beauties.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Nine Years Later

   I have lived in Merced, California, for nine years.  Today I went for a ride in the old folks' home bus.  What a difference.

   The sleepy rural small town has become busy metropolis.  The state has bought land, improved it, built a state university here. Dozens of new medical buildings have been built, featuring specialists of all kinds. No need to go to Fresno or Sacramento or San Francisco for many treatments.  Huge stores from national chains have been built.  Best Buy and Barnes and Noble are just two examples.

   Where did all the doctors that man those medical buildings come from? Or the computer specialists? Did we train all those?  Are they our kids from our own schools? Where did the musicians and the artists learn those skills?

   How about your own town?  I'll bet it is a lot different in past nine years, too.

   Another thing I discovered.  A ride on our jiggly, rough riding bus is a great laxative.  Feel sluggish? Take a ride on our bus.

   SIGN ON MY DOOR:  No Words of Wisdom Today.  Make up your own impertinent slogan and check back here later.


April Fools Day

I already made an April Fool's Day entry  Here's the link.

A Quilt?

   It is five am and too early to be up but here I am.

   It give me time to reflect on the life in the old folks home.

   It is communal living.  Things are gonna get mixed up.  But a QUILT?

   My favorite quilt has vanished from my apartment.  The caregiver remembers putting in my closet, as do I.  But now, when I want it, it is gone.  Imagine.  Someone, in some apartment has been issued my quilt,.  Don't they notice: Hey, this isn't mine...where did it come from?  No they don't.  The caregivers tried to give me some shorts and a green pillowcase that belong to someone else... I noticed.  Surely someone must notice an unfamiliar quilt on their bed.,

LATER:  A housekeeper came by with my lost quilt... "It was in the laundry."  Uh-huh.  I am glad it is home again.