Thursday, May 26, 2005

Weekend Assignment -- Ridiculous Pet Names

   My loyal, best friend, a Golden Retriever, came already named: GRIFFIN. I’m told that means red haired one in Welsh. That was appropriate and it stuck, though I called him Griff. His spayed lady companion, a Border Collie bitch, came named TACKY. I thought that was tacky, so renamed her Tammy. She did not mind.

   When our cat named MISSY had kittens we named them PUNKEN, for Pumpkin, and PUDGY, cause he was the fattest of the litter. Pudgy and Punkin committed incest and produced a litter one of whom we called BAT FACE, for obvious reasons

  My Mom and Dad named their pets as they saw them. GYPSY because she wandered, and SNOOPER because he sniffed everything. Snooper was a Scottie and Dad described Gypsy’s breed as Curbstone Setter. In other words, a non-descript mixture. BOUNCER was a lively dancing boxer.

  Their cats were THIS ONE and THAT ONE. I never knew which was which. Another was COMMON, a common domestic short hair Maybe it was for “come on”, I’m not sure.

   But the most ridiculous pet name I’ve heard was that of dog owned by a medical student. He gave his dog the generic name for Mercurichrome. Imagine calling your dog in at night by shouting through the neighborhood, “Come home little DIBROMOXIMERCUIFLOURICENE.”

   This was a Scalzi Weekend Assignment, but an earlier entry about pet names was Cats in J-land


mavarin said...

Griffin's a good name.  I like the cat names, though, and the medical name.  

A lawyer friend of mine had a black cat named Dis, for a god of the Underworld (or something like that).  His next cat he named Dat.


fisherkristina said...

Hilarious as usual Chuck! -Krissy

ryanagi said...

Bat face...giggle!!!

chasferris said...

Teaching a three year old to spell may not be too hard.  My friend Anita's family named the dog DIOGGE.  The three year old son calls Diogge without realising he is spelling D-O-G.  

chasferris said...

Calling your dog FIDO may not show lack of imagination.  Fido is a wonderful name for a dog.  In Latin, Fido means "I am faithful."

labdancer51 said...

I must admit the names you mention are funny though! Our black lab goes by the more respectable name,  Jake...:-)  

Sandra xxx

valphish said...

LOL  Wow, I hope the medical student had a shorter form for the poor dog, like Dibro or Moxi.  Phew!  Great entry! xox

cyndygee said...

I like, "Red-haired one", very much.  Did that guy really call that dog that HUGE name?  If yes, then W H Y???  Medical student usually put a premium on their time!!!

chaispice1023 said...

My word, what a name he gave that poor dog!  Hope he called him Dib for short.