Monday, June 27, 2005

Pondering

I just spent an hour on the bed with a book, and now I am pondering my existence. The book did that to me I guess.

If I am not reading or writing, I am not doing anything. If I am not working on a relationship, I am not doing anything. Relationships are with family, people I live with, and with on-line friends. Also some relationships are with people who are yet to come, my descendants and others who may be interested, my students, my disciples, my followers. They may learn from me or by studying me. I gave some of me in my genes, and I gave some of me in my teaching.

Not doing anything is wasting time, keeping me from what it is that I am supposed to accomplish. Being eighty, with lots of ailments and physical limitations, I have less time to waste.

Before I die, I have something to do. What is it? Am I doing it? Am I doing it well?

Wow, I can’t put this in my journal, it is too egocentric, too egotistical. Yet, it is what I am pondering right now.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well my opinion is (for what its worth) you are doing what you were meant to do and doing it well. I am sure you bring a lot of pleasure to those around you and to your online friends. I'm happy I met you. Paula

Anonymous said...

I think before the day is threw our lives effect thousands of others, directly or indirectly.. a ripple in the pool of life.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Paula.  This journal is bringing pleasure and enightenment (or at least, a new perspective) to all your readers.  We are enriched!  I sspect that you have the same effect on the students (or ex-students), family members, fellow residents, staff, and even the kids who work at the nearby Starbucks.  

Now, if you want to write the Great American Novel or cure cancer on top of all that, feel free to give that a try, too!  But please don't worry that you're not being productive or making your mark--because you definitely are.

Karen

Anonymous said...

    I don't think this sounds egotistical ... I think it sounds like you care about what your contribution is in this world.  And that is a good thing !  Tina
http://journals.aol.com/onemoretina/Ridealongwithme

Anonymous said...

Sir, I have been reading your journal all day.  I just want to say not only have you accomplished quite a bit (liked the 10 things You have done I haven't!)...but you are obviously making a profound difference in serveral peoples lives.   Your freinds at your residence would agree and so would all the people on the Egg.....(saw the Easter thing too!)

I hope I said that well enough.  Thank you for making a difference in my Monday.  I hope you are well.

Toodles! JG

Anonymous said...

This is NOT too egocentric!  I think of things like this!  I imagine thoughts like this accelerate as you age.  Your thoughts are gifts to us, Gr'pa Groundhog!  This one was very special! xox
http://journals.aol.com/valphish/ValsThoughts

Anonymous said...

I'm 58 Chuck and don't know how I will ever reach your age, in fact I know for certain I have many things to do in life yet, but not sure whether I will. You just keep up tha journal. So,many people derive pleasrue from it.
Love Sylvia xx

Anonymous said...

Charles if you havent figure it out at eigthy I guess I have38 more years to ponder...I thought if was because I'm 43 that I ask myself that question you have showed me that is not so...we are always searching I guess. I thought things would get easier as I got older and some things have but some things have gotten harder <sigh>
You are here to keep teaching ....teaching others and yourself...
You matter....know that you matter
Donna In TEXAS