Thursday, May 1, 2008

Yes, It was Lovely

   My mother wanted to live, to go places, to see things.  Her husband, my step-father, had been places, seen things, had lived through WWII on a tanker in the South Pacific, seen neighboring ships torpedoed.  He wanted to stay home.

   Mother wanted to go to Hawaii, but not alone.  So she took my daughter, her sixteen-year-old grand daughter, with her to tour Hawaii.

   They met people, and saw things, lots of things.  But no matter what they saw, there was always someone who had seen something else, that they liked better. 

   A conversation might go like this:

MOTHER AND GRAND DAUGHTER: We saw the Grand Canyon of the Pacific.

OTHER TOURIST: But did you see the soaring Nene birds which never land?


OTHER TOURIST: Oh, too bad, you have seen those.

MOTHER AND GRAND DAUGHTER: We saw the spouting blow hole shoot water fifty feet into the air.

OTHER TOURIST: Um-hmm, Did you see the Minihuni Trail? Wasn't that wonderful?

MOTHER AND GRAND DAUGHTER: Well, no, I guess we missed that.

OTHER TOURIST; Oh, what a shame.  It was lovely.

  Mother and my daughter soon learned what to say when asked if they had seen this or that sight, tasted this or that food at a luau, or sipped this ot that drink on the lanai.  They learned to answer all such questions with, "Yes.  It was lovely."  With that response they were spared the details of something they had missed.  They had a wonderful time, and they saw, tasted, sipped plenty.  They didn't feel they had missed anything.

   Today the old folks were invited to go on the bus to a fabulous restaurant in town, one that all the local folk used to gather at. It was a famed gathering spot, and "be sure to taste the cole slaw.  They are famous for their cole slaw." I went, and I was pretty hyped up about this local legend.

   We arrived.  The entrance was through the parking lot in the rear. To this out of towner it looked pretty ordinary. It looked to me like any non-chain burger joint.  It had a ranch theme and had some pictures of horses around the walls, and had a "saddle room" adjoining, whatever that is. The menu looked good, but...

   "Do you have ribs," I asked.  No, they didn't.  One sandwich sounded good -- Our Special Ranch Sandwich, with sauteed onions.  I ordered the special.

    "How do you want it cooked?"


   "It is a burger. How do you want it cooked?"  The so-called special was a hamburger.

   "Do you want fries or cole slaw with that?"

   "Cole slaw," I ordered immediately.  I wanted to try their famous cole slow.

   After a while the hamburger came.  It was served with a huge pile of cole slow.  Happily I dug into the cole slaw.  It was quite ordinary. Nothing special about it.  One bite was plenty.  The hamburger was okay, but t was just a hamburger.  I pushed the sauteed onions out of the way and ate the burger patty with A1 sauce.  At least they had genuine A1 sauce on the table. I rate the burger the same as the McDonalds and Carls Jr burgers I reported on in earlier entries here.  Four golden pickles out of five.

   The activity Director of the old folks home came bay and asked, "Did you try the cole slaw?"

   "Yes, It was lovely."

   "Did you have a sandwich?"

   "Yes, It was lovely"



msecz said...

very funny.... I will have to remember that

madcobug said...

Your mother and daughter caught on quickly. Seems like you are following in their footsteps LOL. Sorry that your didn't have a great meal topped with delicious cole slaw. Helen

plieck30 said...

Yes sometime it is better to just agree and go on. Sorry your slaw  was a disappointment. Paula

jocalodave said...

For the first part of my recent 51-week-long trip I allowed people to co-opt my itinerary and I went on wild goose chases to local (and not so local) attractions they described as "must see."

For example, I might take most of a day to go to a place called "the rainbow cliffs" only to discover that the cliffs were far from majestic and not at all colorful. I also got a lot of advice that I didn't take -- and felt that I was somehow letting folks down by not including their favorites.

Then I started asking questions. The answers gave me more than enough strength to eschew the addition of attractions suggested by others. A typical conversation went like this:

Local:  You just HAVE to go see the rainbow cliffs.
Dave:  Do you take friends and family from out of town to see the cliffs?
Local:  Well, not usually. It's a pretty long drive.
Dave:  When was the last time you were out to see the cliffs, yourself"
Local:  Dear me. Well, I guess it has been 15 or 20 years.
Dave:  Well, I'm sure they're wonderful. I hope I can find time to go.

I found it easy to skip venues that the recommenders haven't seen for a decade or two -- and I usually did.

valphish said...

Oh, Chuck, this is priceless.  What is one person's heaven is anothers blah.  I will always remember the line, "Yeah, it was lovely."  Priceless.  Love, Val xox

bamawmn46 said...

This rather sounds like my recent trip to St. Augustine. People ask, Did you see the _________________ (just fill in the blank). No, but i did see the castle, the fountain of youth, the oldest wooden school house, the light house, etc....
And their reply?  Oh, that's to bad you didn't see __________. I just sigh and say, well, you can only do so much in 2 days!!


fisherkristina said...

I would have told him the food was quite ordinary, LOL.  If not, the director might schedule that restruant as your next eat out activity again, LOL.  I would have just told him.  But then again I usually can't keep my mouth shut, and have to state my opinion, LOL...

Krissy :)

rjsisti said...

Congrats on being one of the Guest Editor's Pick